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There are many resources for supporters of gay marriage, but it is more difficult to find people to help when you are planning a gay wedding. The best place to look for resources when planning a gay wedding is on the Internet, in gay magazines, and through word-of-mouth.
There are a lot of companies that specialize in gay weddings. When consulting these companies, it is good to bear in mind that they have their own agenda and will encourage you to buy their services. However, they do provide a wider range of options for gay wedding invitations, venues, rings and other items than mainstream companies.
Keep an eye out for any articles on gay marriage, and save it, to compile your own resource on gay marriage.
There are many churches that will allow same-sex marriages to be conducted within their walls, but as most religions as a whole do not perform gay weddings, couples need to search within their preferred denominations for ministers for their weddings.
For more information on churches allowing same-sex marriages, the quickest resource is through local publications - those articles will usually note the church conducting the ceremony.
The Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists has a list of Baptist churches that are gay-friendly. The
Some Jewish Rabbis are authorised to bless same-sex unions. Consult the World Congress of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender Jews, or the Keshet Ga'avah, to find Rabbis in your area.
With the rise in gay marriages, designers are recognizing the need for gay wedding rings and coming up with beautiful and distinct pieces. Pieces often include gay symbols, such as intertwined or interlocking same-sex symbols, the gay pride triangle or the rainbow flag to signify that the piece is a gay wedding ring. These rings still have the appearance of mainstream contemporary wedding rings, but with a touch of gay pride.
Designers will often use a feature article on gay marriage, or on their own works, to showcase gay wedding rings. They can also be found on the Internet.
A gay wedding can be anything from a registry ceremony and a small party to a formal, lavish event, but there are certain costs involved you should always bear in mind.
The first is administration fees. Getting a marriage license and hiring someone to perform the ceremony are essential costs that can be larger than you bargained for, particularly if you are not getting married at home.
Travel costs, accommodation for yourselves and your witnesses and the loss of wages for time off work should also be taken into account.
There are a number of small costs that can also build up. Weddings are stressful events, so make things easy for yourself. Read up on articles for same sex marriage that give advice. Keep a budget for worst-case scenarios such as extra taxi fares, expensive meals, last-minute purchases of shoes, and any other small items that you might need.
If you are holding a reception, make sure to find out exactly what your preferred venue will provide. Venues that provide music or entertainment help to reduce costs. Sometimes a venue that charges a price per person to provide food and alcohol will be more expensive than going to your favorite bar and hiring a caterer. If hiring a wedding specialist, ensure that they are providing a discount for the amount of custom you are throwing their way.
Remember, while a wedding day is important, it is also important for a couple to start their married life together on a sound financial base. It is not worth getting into debt for a gay wedding that is, essentially, just one day in the rest of your lives together.
When planning a large gay wedding, keep in mind that on top of reception venues and band costs, gifts, clothing, the honeymoon and wedding rings all need to be provided for.
It is important to have a timetable for your gay wedding and follow it in order to ensure you are reasonably stress-free on the big day.
After you announce your intention to be married to friends and family, create a guest list, define your budget, and decide on a short list of venues and celebrants. It™s a good idea to look at articles on same-sex marriage around this point, to give you a basis of knowledge of what to do. Research the legal requirements you need to fill, and start looking for the perfect wedding ring.
With a few months to go, book caterers, photographers and musicians, arrange wedding clothes, plan your song list and book your honeymoon.
Around a month before the wedding day, arrange a rehearsal dinner and finalize all of your other arrangements including hotels and meals.
Your reception venue is the main way to establish what sort of wedding you are holding and, in some ways, what sort of relationship you and your partner have. Many couples choose to use a reception centre that specializes in weddings. The advantage of such a center is that you don't have to worry about decorating, arranging seating, and often can easily arrange food and alcohol. A disadvantage is that you end up have a reception similiar to every other couple.
Another option is to organize everything yourself. This will involve finding a venue, hiring caterers, hiring bar stock and staff, finding musicians and organizing decorating and seating. This can be stressful, so be sure to organize things very early on.
If you have a favorite restaurant or bar, consider asking them to hold your reception. This will mean your reception reflects the kind of couple you are, is in a place you like to be, but doesn't involve as much work as hiring a venue, caterers, music and staff separately.
Review articles on same sex marriage for creative ideas on where to hold your reception.
When it comes to weddings, the biggest question is but 'how far ahead should I book'? The issue of timing all depends on how popular you think the venue/DJ/celebrant is going to be at the time of your wedding.
If you are in an area that has a large number of gay weddings, or has just legalized gay marriage, it is a good idea to book everything you need at least six months ahead. An idea of how popular gay marriage is can be found by looking out for any article on gay marriage you can find or visiting marriage sites in your state.
Bear in mind that the more unique or alternative the option, the more likely it is that you will be able to book it when you need it. However, unique also means that no-one else provides the same service, so it is even more important to book these services.
|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|